Relational Grace
by Chris Sasser

I don’t know about you, but I’ve found that there are times when ministry can be hard. Sure, there is often too much to do and not enough time to do it, but most often, the biggest difficulties revolve around strained or broken relationships. We have an issue with a co-worker, parent, or leader in our church. We feel overworked and underappreciated. People criticize our decisions or undermine our leadership. In some way, the relationships that should be bringing us life drag us down and frustrate us, making it more difficult to do the ministry we feel called to do. We know that people are sinful and “all have fallen short of the glory of God.” We just can’t get over some things, and the ruptured relationships we have seems to dominate our thoughts and emotions.

When we find ourselves in this place, there are a few things we can do to move into a healthier state of mind. First, work to understand and live in God’s grace. We teach people about this grace all the time, but we can sometimes struggle to live in it ourselves. Living in God’s grace starts with us believing that we are forgiven. We know that sometimes, the broken relationships we have are a result of things we have said or done. We need to embrace the truth that we are forgiven, no matter what. This idea always pushes me to what Paul says in Romans 8:1-2: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.” Can you imagine living in a place where you feel no condemnation? What would it feel like to feel the freedom of forgiveness as you navigate the relationships in your life?

Second, humble yourself and ask for forgiveness. In many of our relationships, there are unmet expectations and places where we have fallen short. When you have played a part in a broken relationship, take the time to sincerely apologize. Humbling ourselves in the sight of God and others both helps us continue to live a life of submission and creates opportunities for repaired relationships. When we acknowledge our shortcomings, we enable others to acknowledge theirs, and we are more able to find common ground.

Finally, get into the habit of offering grace and forgiveness to others. It’s easy to see the faults in others and develop a judgmental heart. If we are going to be authentic followers of Jesus and shine His light to others, we need to be people who live out what the Scripture says. There are so many verses that point us to this:

• “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37)
• “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” (Colossians 3:13)

Learning to forgive and live under God’s grace in every way won’t always make ministry smooth or fix all our relational problems, but it will lead us to live in a way that honors God and potentially paves the way for the restoration of relationships.