Faith Milestones Matter
by Amy Diller
From the moment we find out we’re going to be parents, we begin marking firsts. We marvel at hearing our child’s heartbeat for the first time, seeing the wonder of that little one on an ultrasound, and feeling those kicks as they grow. We continue to note every developmental milestone once they’re born, such as rolling over, crawling, talking, and walking. Through pictures and videos, we try to capture and preserve every moment so we can look back on it later.
As parents who desire to see our kids develop an abiding relationship with the Lord and walk in obedience to Him, we can nurture their faith through milestone moments. Think of this spiritual development like you do their physical growth. While a child grows physically, mentally, and emotionally, they also develop a deeper understanding of God from the world and people around them.
Throughout His Word, God tells us to look back and see what He’s done as a way to strengthen our faith in Him. After God brought Noah and his family out of the ark, Noah built an altar of worship to the Lord to mark His faithfulness to them. When Joshua and the Israelites crossed the Jordan to go into the Promised Land, they built an altar to remember what God had done for them. These altars weren’t fancy; they were made from everyday materials readily available.
As Christians, we are called to remember what God has done for us. When it comes to our children, celebrating and preserving their faith steps is an important part of their spiritual development that we can look back on with them as part of their story.
So how do we do this? Following are some stages of development, along with ways to celebrate and remember important faith moments. Just as you would document and celebrate all of the other developmental milestones, capture and revisit these memories with your kids, too.
Babies and Toddlers
This is a time of tremendous and rapid growth for your child. Over the course of a couple of years, he or she moves from complete dependence on you to walking, talking, and being able to do simple things like feeding themselves or picking up their toys.
Children at this stage are developing an understanding of love and security. As the adults in their lives meet their needs, children learn to trust that they will be cared for. It’s in these interactions that the foundation for trusting a loving God is built.
Family Faith Moment – Infant or Child Dedication
Sometimes called Parent Dedication, this is a time for parents to stand before their church family and commit to raising their child in a faith-filled home with the help of God and other believers. Although many parents dedicate their children during this stage, some who come to faith later will do this with their older children, too. Talk to your children’s leader about how to take this step now.
Preschoolers
Little ones at this stage are all about discovery. They are natural explorers and hands-on learners, and like sponges, they absorb so much from the world around them. As their vocabulary expands, so does their ability to understand what others are saying, both verbally and nonverbally.
At this age, learning about God through everyday experiences helps a child construct a more concrete picture of who He is. When he or she is enthralled with an unusual-looking bug or finds a rock that must become part of their growing collection of “treasures,” talking about God’s amazing creation helps them see Him in the world around them. Introducing them to God’s Word through pictures, Bibles, and songs adds to their spiritual development.
Family Faith Moment – Prayer of Blessing
Although this can be done at any stage of development, regularly praying a blessing over a child whose sense of self is growing helps him or her understand God’s care for and affirmation of who he created them to be. One of the most familiar blessing prayers is found in Numbers 6:24-26, but you can turn many Bible verses into prayers for the Lord’s provision and protection over your little one.
Younger Elementary (Kindergarten-2nd Grade)
Children are growing a little more independent from their mothers and fathers in these years. They still very much need you in every aspect of their lives, but when kids begin school, their relationships expand to include peers and other adults in addition to family. School-aged kids are very curious and perceptive.
Spiritually, kids at this age are capable of understanding sin and redemption in simple terms. They know what it means to be disobedient and the concept of consequences. Introducing the truth that the cost of sin is death and separation from God helps kids see the necessity and gift of Jesus’s death and resurrection. If you are uncertain how to have these conversations at home, reach out to your children’s leader for some practical support.
Family Faith Moment – Commitment of Faith
Every person’s decision to accept the free gift of salvation through Jesus comes at a different point in their lives. Developmentally, this is the age when a child may be ready to make an individual commitment of faith. Although we often feel pressure to hurry our kids into salvation, it is important for this to be a personal commitment. Your responsibility as a parent is to surround your child with godly instruction and model living as a disciple of Jesus. Allow him or her to lead the way in making a decision to become a Christian. Be ready to walk them through asking the Lord to forgive their sins and make them a part of His family forever. The Lord embraces a child’s genuine prayer, and heaven celebrates their decision of faith. One way to preserve and look back on this milestone would be to help your child write his or her testimony to save for years to come.
Older Elementary (3rd – 5th Grade)
At this age, children are moving from very concrete, literal ways of thinking to understanding more symbolic and abstract concepts. Kids look not only to parents but also to teachers, coaches, and peers for information and affirmation. The ability to consider the feelings of others and extend empathy and compassion expands during these years.
Older elementary kids start to ask more complex questions about faith. Kids this age want to know more than the who or what; they want to know the why. Asking hard questions helps them deepen their faith. This is where having parents and church leaders who are willing to listen and seek answers together with them is an integral part of their walk with the Lord.
Family Faith Moment – “Big Kid” Bible, Communion, Baptism
As the ability to think symbolically develops alongside increasing reading skills, these kids are often ready for a “big kid” Bible – one that offers the entire Bible in a format that’s just for them, like The Adventure Bible or The Hands-On Bible. Help him or her establish regular times of Bible reading on their own in addition to what you do together as a family.
Depending on your church’s traditions, your older elementary child may also be ready to participate in communion and baptism. Teach them about what each means in the Christian faith, and allow them to take the lead when they are ready. Your church may have classes or materials you can use with your child in preparation for both.
For those of you at the beginning of your journey as a parent, I encourage you to take some time to think about the road ahead. Talk with leaders at your church for ideas and support in discipling your kids at home. Create a plan for incorporating faith milestones into your family and find ways to capture these moments to help you and your children remember these important steps.
If you are in the middle of raising kids and haven’t yet incorporated celebrating faith milestones into your family’s life, I want to assure you that it’s not too late. Don’t allow the enemy to steal these precious moments with your children away from you by telling you that you’ve missed the boat. You can start to celebrate meaningful moments in your children’s growing faith from this time forward.